Some Teachers Suck

“Don’t be a teacher that sucks!” I stared at my trainer at Republic Polytechnic, not quite believing my ears. So what is the most important teacher skill?

Yes, she looked straight into my eyes. Some teachers are just horrible, she reminded me.

Unfortunately, from experience, what she spoken the truth. I have met so many friends and relatives who became teachers. While some truly want to change people’s lives and inspire, most I have met became teachers because it pays, and they tell me so blatantly. Often, after they have failed to get other jobs.

Those who can, do; those who can’t, teach. I believed this all my life until I had no choice but to give up my own career and became an instructor in the university.

Discovering Teaching

Teaching was the wilderness to me. I have always seen myself as an entrepreneur, the founder and the CEO of companies. I like to negotiate with world-class businessmen and close multi-million dollars deals, I like to sit on government round-tables to give suggestions, I like to strategize and second guess and beat the market trend.

But as it turned out, I had actually forgotten how much I love to teach: it’s much better than being an air stewardess visiting the world, it is much better than sitting on the same table with who’s who during a gala dinner. Those were great, but teaching is far greater.

Teaching Failing Students

At 15, I started teaching as a tuition teacher as I wanted to be independent. My student was just three years younger and he had one month to taking his PSLE exams. He had failed his preliminary math exam, so his mother wanted me to perform a miracle.

This little boy came to my house twice a week for a month and I had no clue if I could help him. But I knew how to make him laugh and think. I would create Math questions with him as the protagonist. He laughed and participated in my jokes. At the end of the month, his mom did not pay me.

However, on the day they released the PSLE results, she brought $40 and a gold chain to my house. He had not only passed math, but scored an A.

I realized I could feed myself by telling stories to little children. So, I continued.

Teaching Students with Emotional Needs

The next family that came to me was an Indonesian family with three girls. They lived in a big house in Bishan area with a house keeper, a driver and a maid. Their parents visited them once every month or so.

The youngest daughter was not very interested in studies, so in order to get her to the ‘tuition room’, I had to go to her room to wake her up and carry her school bag.

I became particular good friends with the second daughter, and her academic work was good. Seeing that they were always at home watching the TV, I wanted to tell her a bit about the world. So, I brought her to cut her hair, played badminton with her, bought ingredients to bake cakes with her. In the end, she told me that her parents had asked her who I was, that I could get the youngest girl to start scoring close to full marks for spelling and tests when she used to get zeroes.

But I think she missed the point. The parents were probably scared that I was trying to get too close, so they found ‘less involved’ teachers. I got it. They were rich and had to be careful of people who might have ulterior motives.

Teaching the Capable and Smart

Another memorable family was a 3-generation family that I taught. The kids were the smartest I have ever taught. The boy was Sec 3 and his work was already good. So, I started teaching him Sec 4 additional math and we got him ready for ‘O’ levels when he was in Sec 3. The girl was Primary 5 and I did the same for her for PSLE.

I would bring them cakes that I baked and shared funny jokes. In the end, I had nothing else to teach them as they were so ahead, so I stopped. Many years later, I received messages and photographs from them. They did so well in school and in life.

That was when my career started to take off as well and I stopped teaching. I didn’t resume teaching until decades later, when I had to stay home to mind my children and started teaching in the university.

Teaching in the University

In the university, I was on the Dean’s list every semester I taught. This is not an easy feat, given my colleagues were mostly professors who were highly regarded in their fields.

As I reflect, I think I know why I managed to rank high. Being a great teacher is not about how much subject matter we know, but how much we can inspire our students to learn.

It is no different whether we are teaching students who are failing, those who need more emotional support or those who are already excelling in every aspect. There are always things we can do to motivate them to do better for themselves.

The Most Important Teacher Skill – Teaching People

Over the years, I have taught thousands of students, and people comment that my students really do very well. I always believe that a good teacher can teach almost anything. It is not the curriculum, but how we can inspire our students that counts.

That is my little secret. The secret to why students with learning disabilities who cannot even score 150 at PSLE can catch up and score A’s in high school. The same reason why 11-year-old previously bored students hope that they will prepare for university entrance exams by 14. Same reason why bankers-wannabes or jobless people became great mega-millionaire entrepreneurs after attending my classes.

I actually didn’t do much. My job is really to find what is already in the students and to bring that to the fullest potential. My job is to inspire them to be who they already are deep inside but buried from the noise of the cruel world.

I think, I finally understand what the RP trainer was saying. Most teachers impose too much of themselves on students and ignore what incredible gifts they each already possess. For me, I believe my job is to inspire and motivate through anything I teach. Teaching a subject or curriculum is easy. Teaching people is not. It is about finding the best in that person and finding ways to maximize his potential in the field we teach. People will forget what we teach but they will not forget what we say to them.

Everybody has something to teach and therefore is a teacher in some ways. Everybody has to inspire and motivate. That’s the most important teacher skill we should have.

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Great Educators make Great Students

[/vc_column_text][vc_video link=”https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SFnMTHhKdkw”][vc_column_text]I was touched by how instead of screaming at my nine-year-old daughter, he put his arms around her shoulders and explained to her that the greatest tragedy is to have to ever lie to a parent who cares, because the parent is someone who will stand up for her no matter what happens.

It didn’t take him even a second to forgive my daughter for telling a lie that got him and a few teachers in the school spinning around to look for solutions.  His motive was clear: he captured the opportunity to teach his student and not only did my daughter learn the lesson well, we remember his kindness to this day.

Unfortunately, a principal like that is often under appreciated.

I put my child in his school simply because I was a horrible and busy CEO-mum who was too busy preparing for my own company’s listing that I forgot to register my child for primary school.  Fortunately, this principal’s school moved into the neighbourhood that year and he had many places left even after Phase 2C was over.  He gladly took my kid in.

It is not only about Academic Results

Trying to reform myself from the inattentive mum, I asked about the future of my child: the GEP program, EM1 etc etc. His tacit reply was that he was not concerned about those and his aim was not to gear the children for examinations.

Through the years, my children and their classmates did not have supplementary or remedial classes, instead, they participated in activities  he engaged the alumnus help to bring into the school.  The school had interesting CCAs like stilt-walking, from traditional to modern dances, and my daughters went on to sing in the new choir, and swam in the new swim team.

When I went to fetch my younger daughter one time, I saw him teaching her how to mop the floor to keep it dry and safe after the rain.  He weighed my daughter’s bag when we told him it was really heavy, he sent a thank you card to me for sponsoring the school swim team and for always being there to cheer for them.

My contributions to the school were few, but when I spent an afternoon just tying the choir girls’ hair up, the thank yous were never-ending.

Partnering the Parents

Our school is not an ‘elite school’, so most children come from double-incomed heartlander families. During the choir competitions, we have a meagre group of five parents cheering for our 80-strong choir.  The school was not choosy who got into the choir, every child who wanted to sing could sing for the school While our support was pathetic, our children’s voices were powerful.

Other choirs had beautiful and shining costumes, while our kids just wore their cleanest uniforms and sang with gusto.  For the four years my girls spent in the choir, the choir went for two competitions and the school won two Gold awards, a feat not even achievable by more matured choirs.

I believe it was all because the school had great leadership and passionate teachers. Though the teachers could not garner many parents to support them during working hours, they made up this lack by their clear communications with the parents, amicable relations with those of us who could help, and being always appreciative.

Year after year, whenever there was a national sport competition, my son’s school teachers would be counting the number of medals they win, while my girls’ school was happy to have a finalist.  While my sons’ school had a set of track suit each, my daughter’s friends were happy to have a new T-shirt with their names that are printed by a printer I engaged.I did that just so  they would feel special about representing their school.

The swim teacher would be there to smile whenever the school team lost but would make sure my girls got the recognition they deserve for representing the country in their respective sport.  Even in a neighbourhood school, my daughters were given the same opportunities as my sons.

The principal and teachers never fail to thank me above what I really deserve, and because of the wonderful relationship with the school, both my girls had great primary school educations, and great memories of their childhood.  And even though one of my daughters had problems with school at one time, the school volunteered a counselor without my prompting.

End of an Era

By the time my younger daughter reached upper primary, it was time for this principal to leave.  There was no fanfare, no great celebration.  I heard that he was to become the principal of another neighbourhood primary school.

Some said that he was not promoted because of his mediocre performance but I choose to believe he was so good with our school, that he has gone on to do the same for another school.

Indeed, our school was transformed from a simple neighbourhood school to a sought-after one vibrant with interesting activities and good PSLE scores. While there was no career celebration according to some, the love in the kids were present.  My daughter cried for a week and still talks about him to this day.  Certainly, the care and concern he showed to my daughters were felt.

Soul Educators

An educator like him makes a difference in our children’s lives.  Selfless, giving and did not succumb to the many measurements that would have made him mercenary so that he could climb the corporate ladder.  While he was concerned about the academic results, he was even more concerned for bringing up good people with souls.  He set the culture for the school and his teachers were no less great to work with.

While I wonder if his effort will be appreciated by those who matter more in his career path, I appreciate him deeply for all that he has done.

It is often the silent workers, the quiet and unassuming educators who make differences in our children’s lives, yet they are often forgotten.

Soul educators are also in my son’s school. I remember the Australian P5 teacher who would give my P2 child a place in her class when his own teacher sent him away, the disciplinary master who would soften her voice and told my son he could run to her whenever he had problems, the gentle VP who would stop by for every boy to have a gentle word with him, the Chinese teacher who was not afraid to say that my son was not a problem even though she was pressurized to say he was, the kind Killer Whale GEP HOD who would use antiseptic wipe to clean the floor so that it was spotless for the boys to sit on.

Sadly, their voices were often drowned by their more aggressive and career-minded colleagues or superiors who needed quicker and more evident results than building up a soul. Often, their humanly advice go unheard amongst the more aggressive demands of theirs and their superiors’ KPIs.[/vc_column_text][vc_row_inner column_margin=”default” column_direction=”default” column_direction_tablet=”default” column_direction_phone=”default” text_align=”left”][vc_column_inner column_padding=”padding-4-percent” column_padding_tablet=”inherit” column_padding_phone=”inherit” column_padding_position=”all” background_color=”#960000″ background_color_opacity=”1″ background_hover_color_opacity=”1″ font_color=”#ffffff” column_shadow=”none” column_border_radius=”none” column_link_target=”_self” gradient_direction=”left_to_right” overlay_strength=”0.3″ width=”1/1″ tablet_width_inherit=”default” column_border_width=”none” column_border_style=”solid” bg_image_animation=”none”][vc_column_text]And while you won’t like them (students) all, the key is they can never, ever know it. So teachers become great actors and great actresses and we come to work when we don’t feel like it and we listen to policies that don’t make sense and we teach anyway.

We teach anyway because that’s what we do. Teaching and learning should bring joy. How powerful would our world be if we had kids who were not afraid to take risks, who had a champion.  Every child deserves a champion, an adult who will never give up on them, who understands the power of connection and insists that they become the best that they can possibly be.

Is this job tough, you betcha, but it is not impossible. We can do this, we are educators.  We are born to make a difference.

~ Rita Pierson[/vc_column_text][/vc_column_inner][/vc_row_inner][vc_column_text]So, perhaps I was really a useless mom who even forgot to register my child in a school during the P1 registration. But that mistake was probably the best that I have ever made, and my daughters have that mistake to thank for their priceless primary school education, one that is built around relationships and care.[/vc_column_text][/vc_column][/vc_row]

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Teachers and Educators

It is always discouraging to be stuck academically and because schools normally build information sequentially, the inability to understand a topic often hinders progression to the next.  Tutors can come to the rescue.

Many parents think that tuition is beneficial to their children and while I do agree after school temporary tuition should be procured when the students need to get over the hump sometimes, I don’t think mandatory tuition should be encouraged.

Tuition to Hothouse

I am curious if people realize that long term tuition can be detrimental as it robs a student of a chance to develop great non-cognitive skills that is vital for academic success at more advanced stages.

My aversion for tuition starts with its instrumentality in dividing our society from the have’s and have not’s. Parents with herd’s mentality jump quickly onto the bandwagon believing and seeing temporal lustrous results in their younger years.

While it is true in any hothousing setting that immediate result can be achieved and hence may open more educational opportunities for the students when they were young I wonder if any parent ever thought of the detrimental effects of tuition on children.

Shifting Motivation/Passion from Child

Students need to want to achieve and learn how to motivate themselves, and tuition removes the need for them to learn that almost completely.

I was told that people send their children as young as five years old for phonics tuition these days, and some 12-year-olds spend more than eight hours a week having tuition!

If you consider 30 hours of school, 8 hours of CCA, 10 hours of homework, an average student already has a whopping 48-hour work week, and parents load another 8-12 hours of tuition… not including the transport time. Where would the child have a chance to think about his dreams, his passion and his direction in life?

How would he ever find the skills to manage his own schedule if he continues to run everywhere for this and that, and none planned by him?How will he have the time to dream and be creative?

Why then, are we surprised when many 18-year-olds have not nurtured a passion or found a calling by the time they start their university studies? (I am not talking about their parents’ passion or calling.)

Loss of Opportunity in Developing Thinking Skills and Grit

[/vc_column_text][vc_row_inner column_margin=”default” column_direction=”default” column_direction_tablet=”default” column_direction_phone=”default” text_align=”left”][vc_column_inner column_padding=”no-extra-padding” column_padding_tablet=”inherit” column_padding_phone=”inherit” column_padding_position=”all” background_color_opacity=”1″ background_hover_color_opacity=”1″ column_shadow=”none” column_border_radius=”none” column_link_target=”_self” gradient_direction=”left_to_right” overlay_strength=”0.3″ width=”1/2″ tablet_width_inherit=”default” column_border_width=”none” column_border_style=”solid” bg_image_animation=”none”][vc_column_text]Most good tutors have systems and methodologies to help their students achieve high scores in standardized exams, and that is bad. Of course that sounds absurd, because scoring well in standardized exams is good, but not if your answers were created by someone else and regurgitated or reworded for exams.[/vc_column_text][/vc_column_inner][vc_column_inner column_padding=”padding-4-percent” column_padding_tablet=”inherit” column_padding_phone=”inherit” column_padding_position=”all” background_color=”#960000″ background_color_opacity=”1″ background_hover_color_opacity=”1″ font_color=”#ffffff” column_shadow=”none” column_border_radius=”none” column_link_target=”_self” gradient_direction=”left_to_right” overlay_strength=”0.3″ width=”1/2″ tablet_width_inherit=”default” column_border_width=”none” column_border_style=”solid” bg_image_animation=”none”][vc_column_text]*Bloom’s Taxonomy is a classification of learning objectives within education proposed in 1956 by a committee of educators chaired by Benjamin Bloom.[/vc_column_text][/vc_column_inner][/vc_row_inner][vc_column_text]In the midst, the student would have lost the problem solving opportunity. In ‘rescuing’ them too quickly from difficult questions and problems, we save time and help them score higher in exams, but we rob them of that opportunity to develop their thinking skills in critical situations.  They would have also lost the chance to develop grit and problem solving skills.  Instead, we develop their remembering skills, which is the lowest in the hierarchy of thinking skills in Bloom’s Taxonomy.*

Trained to Look for the Single Right Answer

If you work or study in an international environment where your colleagues do not come from a hot housing atmosphere, you will know the delight of watching even an average student or worker think and create his/her own solutions, while those heavily tutored are always looking for the single ‘right’ answer that pleases either the lecturer or the boss, because they have always been fed with the right answers.

As the lecturer and an ex-boss, let me tell you that no single right answer exists in the university or in the real world. So, students who are brought up to look for them are sadly disillusioned and take a longer time to get accustomed to this fact, and learn to create solutions they believe in.

Ultimate Competition is within Oneself

Of course, I understand why everyone is still going to tuition and that some of our best teachers are still leaving public schools to become highly-paid tutors. And it is because it makes complete sense in the current situation where competition is paramount in our society. But is it really?

I have always had difficulty believing competition against peers is important, even when I was the CEO, and even when I was a competitive athlete. The best competition is within oneself, to always want to better oneself and achieve a higher goal than one has already attained, and it need not matter what others have achieved, whether they are better or worse.

Beating a peer can never justify an ego trip, and failing is never about losing face.

More than Academic Achievements

If we need to teach our students that the only way to prove that they are worthy is to have a high PSLE T-score (on a bell-curve), straight A’s for ‘O’ levels and ‘A’ levels, perfect IB and SAT scores, then we have completely missed out teaching them anything important, except to chase for academic results blindly.

Fortunately, most of us who have been through these know the limitations of mere academic results, yet we repeat the same process with our little ones.

Employees and university entrance committees know that good candidates possess great non-cognitive skills. That is why, they look for other qualities: their abilities to think on their feet, articulate their own thoughts, and communicate these confidently.

Therefore, even straight A’s students might not get into the door if they pale in comparison to those with less dazzling academic results but with great social and emotional skills. And even if they get in the door, they may not fair well unless they too unlearn their bad habits learned through tuition and acquire the proper and more important abilities.

Stop Following the Herd!

Perhaps the education system have us parents and educators going in circles chasing after the bell curve and standardized exams, but we have the fiduciary duty to ensure that in chasing these, we do not compromise our values and deprive our kids of learning important skills.

So before you recommend or sign someone up for another tuition or enrichment class, look at the student again: give it a second thought, and him/her another vote of confidence and believe that he/she can do without it.[/vc_column_text][/vc_column][/vc_row]

[vc_row type=”in_container” full_screen_row_position=”middle” column_margin=”default” column_direction=”default” column_direction_tablet=”default” column_direction_phone=”default” scene_position=”center” text_color=”dark” text_align=”left” row_border_radius=”none” row_border_radius_applies=”bg” overlay_strength=”0.3″ gradient_direction=”left_to_right” shape_divider_position=”bottom” bg_image_animation=”none”][vc_column column_padding=”no-extra-padding” column_padding_tablet=”inherit” column_padding_phone=”inherit” column_padding_position=”all” background_color_opacity=”1″ background_hover_color_opacity=”1″ column_shadow=”none” column_border_radius=”none” column_link_target=”_self” gradient_direction=”left_to_right” overlay_strength=”0.3″ width=”1/1″ tablet_width_inherit=”default” tablet_text_alignment=”default” phone_text_alignment=”default” column_border_width=”none” column_border_style=”solid” bg_image_animation=”none”][vc_column_text]As she justified to her supervisor why she had suspended my 9-year-old son indefinitely from the classroom, my heart sank, because the more she spoke, the more she showed me what kind of educator she is.

She had no care nor concern for the child and her job in the meeting that day was to justify and ensure she kept her position as the principal.

Though I had asked for the agenda for the meeting, my emails were ignored.  I realized why later: by not providing me the information, there was no way for me to find out from my son what happened from his perspective. If they were to bring out any incidents and I would be caught off guard.

The P3 form teacher even told me she was on gag order by her principal.

Suspended Indefinitely

Nobody communicated anything to my family prior to my son bringing home a letter that had only three sentences in it, saying he would be suspended from school: no action item required, no date of when he would return, no mention of what he did wrong, except that the school did not know how to handle him.

I called the form teacher, all she said was that she was not allowed to talk about it and asked her why she recommended for my son to be suspended. She said she didn’t and it was ‘management’s decision’.

I called the principal, who said he was not to go to school until further notice.  I asked her what she wanted to achieve and what she wanted him to learn – no answer.

Round about February, the school wrote to me to ask my son to go for his term 1 exams in March.  I was surprised – not allowed to go to school but he was to sit for term 1 exams?

I told the school he did not even attend school for months, so how was he to know what to study?  I was not going to set him up for failure like that.

The principal’s reply was that if we refused, he would not be eligible for school honours which he won the year before (even without attending school).  But I was not going to take it anymore, I complained – after almost two years of unreasonable on-and-off suspensions from a principal who thought she could get away with anything.

Our piano teacher rejoiced!  She asked me why I took so long to make this complain, being a seasoned teacher to gifted children, she told me he was not very different from other gifted music students and did not understand why I did not do anything to help him, and accepted ‘rubbish’ from those educators.

The schoolbus driver was happy he could go to school!  Even though he was suspended, I continued to pay for the school bus hoping he would get on it again. He too felt that I complained too late and asked me why.

The reason was very simple, I was convinced by this principal and his teachers that my son was not gifted and of no use, could not be handled whatsoever, and I was hoping that by not complaining, my son would have a better time in school.

I did my son a disservice that I regret to this day. I did not stand up for him against school bullies: the educators.

At the end of the meeting, I was told my son was autistic (Aspergers), and the superintendent assured me that he was not to be officially suspended again.

Special Support Denied

As he often finished his work fast, the ministry suggested the school give him extra and more challenging work but that was not taken up.  I offered to prepare the worksheets so that the school could use them for other kids as well – no response. He was too bored after he finished his work, but no one wanted to acknowledge that.

After so many threats from the school, we agreed to send him for an IQ test, it was a disaster because it was raining heavily and he was so worried about me driving around, he refused to answer the junior psychologist any question.

When I told our own psychologist that the test might not be exact, she said it was not important, as all they wanted to know was that he was at least average.  Riding on this result, they believed he was not gifted, so nothing was done.

I was lost – not gifted, not special, so the only possibility was exactly what they said: that he was a monster.

“Your child cannot be gifted, and I will know because my son was from the Gifted Program,” boasted his P2 teacher who insisted my child was so bad, I should be caning him, and that I was responsible for his behavior as an incapable mum.

Interestingly, a year later, my son also made it to the same Gifted Program.

A Monster to the Educators

“And you will sit next to the monster as a punishment!”, his P3 teacher told another student, JC, when the very brilliant boy made her furious.  But to his surprise, that monster turned out completely different from what his teachers described.

JC’s mother, being an excellent parent and counselor, taught his son to love and accept my son, the ‘monster’.

With that, my son proved the teachers and allied teachers wrong: he could make friends and he could keep friends. JC remains one of my son’s best friends to this day, five years later.

Sadly, instead of being happy for my son, their student, the educators were upset that they were proven wrong.

“So my teachers are falling sick because of him, we cannot have him in our classrooms, he is hurting them”, his P4 (different) principal told me, “and even after his P4 form teacher no longer teaches the class, he is still falling sick – all because his health was weakened by your son last year!”

I wondered if the group of educators and teachers in the room felt a tinge of regret for saying such things or if they had any proof.  I wondered if they were parents themselves.

They told me I was part of the reason they were withdrawing support, because I was too demanding and it was difficult to keep up with the weekly reports.  It was painful yet funny, because I did not ask for weekly reports, and now that they found it hard to sustain their own standards, it was my fault.

I began to wonder if it was right to deny a child of his education even if his parents were difficult.

The Journey Alone Starts

After trying and trying and trying for years and years, I realized the journey was mine to travel alone. If I did not as his mother, stand up, fight and look for an education for him, he will be exactly like what they predicted – useless, a monster, weakening people’s health, and the only place for him was the Special School for Autistic children, whether or not he has autism.

So I hung on with all my might, while every educator gave up.  I searched for that someone who would teach him and show him what his gifts are. I knew that if I failed to give up, I would find a solution.[/vc_column_text][vc_row_inner column_margin=”default” column_direction=”default” column_direction_tablet=”default” column_direction_phone=”default” text_align=”left”][vc_column_inner column_padding=”padding-4-percent” column_padding_tablet=”inherit” column_padding_phone=”inherit” column_padding_position=”all” background_color=”#960000″ background_color_opacity=”1″ background_hover_color_opacity=”1″ font_color=”#ffffff” column_shadow=”none” column_border_radius=”none” column_link_target=”_self” gradient_direction=”left_to_right” overlay_strength=”0.3″ width=”1/1″ tablet_width_inherit=”default” column_border_width=”none” column_border_style=”solid” bg_image_animation=”none”][vc_column_text]It is possible, others have done it! Jacob Barnett, a genius thought to be smarter than Einstein, was also diagnosed with severe autism and went against the odds. His mother documented his journey here.[/vc_column_text][/vc_column_inner][/vc_row_inner][vc_column_text]If you think your child is hopeless, hold on. I will share with you in the next article of the journey I took to look for recovery for my son from educators’ mistreatment, ways to teach him social skills and at the same time search for educators who know how to teach him find his passion and gift to build up his self-esteem again.[/vc_column_text][/vc_column][/vc_row]

[vc_row type=”in_container” full_screen_row_position=”middle” column_margin=”default” column_direction=”default” column_direction_tablet=”default” column_direction_phone=”default” scene_position=”center” text_color=”dark” text_align=”left” row_border_radius=”none” row_border_radius_applies=”bg” overlay_strength=”0.3″ gradient_direction=”left_to_right” shape_divider_position=”bottom” bg_image_animation=”none”][vc_column column_padding=”no-extra-padding” column_padding_tablet=”inherit” column_padding_phone=”inherit” column_padding_position=”all” background_color_opacity=”1″ background_hover_color_opacity=”1″ column_shadow=”none” column_border_radius=”none” column_link_target=”_self” gradient_direction=”left_to_right” overlay_strength=”0.3″ width=”1/1″ tablet_width_inherit=”default” tablet_text_alignment=”default” phone_text_alignment=”default” column_border_width=”none” column_border_style=”solid” bg_image_animation=”none”][vc_column_text]*Written in 2011

I was in the attic just two days ago looking for some books, and I chanced upon my son’s P1 Chinese file. I flipped through that and was reminded of the child before his school problems started.

His file is still neat and filed chronologically to perfection. Every piece of work was done meticulously, and they were either full marks or close to that. In P2, he was placed in the enrichment Chinese class, meant for more advanced Chinese learners.

Today, he is exempted from Chinese. Since P2, his work is a mess, and he cannot remember much of any administration things he needs to do. What a change?! Instead of progressing, he has regressed.

For the past three years, it had only been suspensions from school, complaints, caning and seeing one psychologist after another. It all started with just one really difficult teacher, who did not have chemistry with the Boy, and one new and clueless principal.[/vc_column_text][vc_row_inner column_margin=”default” column_direction=”default” column_direction_tablet=”default” column_direction_phone=”default” text_align=”left”][vc_column_inner column_padding=”no-extra-padding” column_padding_tablet=”inherit” column_padding_phone=”inherit” column_padding_position=”all” background_color_opacity=”1″ background_hover_color_opacity=”1″ column_shadow=”none” column_border_radius=”none” column_link_target=”_self” gradient_direction=”left_to_right” overlay_strength=”0.3″ width=”1/2″ tablet_width_inherit=”default” column_border_width=”none” column_border_style=”solid” bg_image_animation=”none”][vc_column_text]This teacher is semi-blind in a physical sense. I’m not sure why she was still the form teacher, but her capabilities were limited. She would make silly mistakes like mis-marking that The Boy would catch. She was always offended. She hated The Boy.

It didn’t help that this lady is the wife of an influential person in school. I have no clue who this influential person is, except that it is someone the principal cannot offend, so she told me.

I was called into the principal’s office the first weeks The Boy was in this lady’s class. I was told The Boy had toppled tables and chairs and created a whole scene, endangering students in the class. When I reached, the principal was fuming mad, and this teacher was by her side:[/vc_column_text][/vc_column_inner][vc_column_inner column_padding=”padding-4-percent” column_padding_tablet=”inherit” column_padding_phone=”inherit” column_padding_position=”all” background_color=”#960000″ background_color_opacity=”1″ background_hover_color_opacity=”1″ font_color=”#ffffff” column_shadow=”none” column_border_radius=”none” column_link_target=”_self” gradient_direction=”left_to_right” overlay_strength=”0.3″ width=”1/2″ tablet_width_inherit=”default” column_border_width=”none” column_border_style=”solid” bg_image_animation=”none”][vc_column_text]

[/vc_column_text][/vc_column_inner][/vc_row_inner][vc_column_text]Principal: Mrs Lim, your son has been a nuisance and he tried to topple the tables and this is not acceptable.

Me: Why did he do that?

Teacher: This morning, as a standard routine, I asked to boys to change places and sit with another batch of students. TMY was assigned to sit next to The Boy. Your boy threw up a big fuss. He called TMY God’s biggest mistake in creation and refused to sit next to the boy. And then he toppled all the tables and chairs.

(Now this is really strange to me, because The Boy has never toppled anything in the house.)

Me: Teacher, you called me last week and told me about The Boy not wanting to sit next to TMY and I asked that you not do this again. Why did you assign him to sit with TMY again? The Boy is afraid of TMY’s skin condition.

Teacher: It was RANDOM. I RANDOMLY assigned them. Anyway, I have already explained TMY’s skin condition to class, and he has no right to be afraid.

Me: Can I ask The Boy his version, and then get back to you?

(Principal looked at Teacher, and Teacher shook her head)

Principal: No, we do not allow such investigations in our school.

Teacher: There’s no HIS version and MY version. I am telling the truth, and all your boy can do is lie.

They then brought me to his classroom. They left a table toppled for me to witness, and he was sitting alone in an empty room. I went to The Boy.

The Boy: Mummy, I thought you have to teach today, why are you here?

Me: Your principal asked me to come. Why did you topple the tables?

The Boy: Mummy, I didn’t topple the table. You see, this morning the teacher asked us for an oral file. I didn’t have mine. She insisted I forgot to bring it to school, I told her I left it in school with her. She refused to believe me.

Then, she punished me and refused to let me answer any question in class.

Later, we found the file under another student’s (class monitor) table. She then accused me of leaving it below that students’ table. I didn’t. After that, to get back at me, she made us change places and purposely ask TMY to sit next to me.

Mummy, TMY is very scary, his skin is red and falling off, so I kept telling her no.

She insisted and got two boys to push TMY’s table next to mine anyway. I tried to stop it and went against their force from the other side of the table. I think I am much stronger than both of them, so the table toppled.

Principal: Mrs Lim, please bring The Boy home.

Me: Do you want to go home?

The Boy: No mummy, I want to learn. I want to sit here and learn.

(He sat up straight and put his hands together.)

Me: (I took a look at the teacher and the principal who gestured they wanted him out of the classroom.) Mummy will teach you at home. It’s ok.

That was the first problem we had. I then asked for a change of class or teacher, but the principal disagreed. After a few more conflicts with the same teacher, the school decided to issue him a letter telling him not to go back to school. We then called the teacher to ask for a reason. There was no explanation except that they could not handle my son.

I then wrote to his Chinese teacher. She said he had no problem in her class and she was happy to take him. With that email, I asked the principal if he could go for the Chinese class, and skip English and Math. The principal said he could not choose. He was either to get along or not attend class.

It went on for the whole year. Throughout the year, there were many incidents such as this, different stories from the teacher and the student. Each time, the student was wrong and she was right, no deviation, even if she was not there to witness any incident, she would input and said that my son was wrong.

After some time, she even claimed that others agreed with her.

Nobody was really on his side except for one P5 teacher educated in Australia, who was against suspensions and not listening to children. Whenever he had problems, she would volunteer to have him in her P5 class, and she told me she had no problem, and he could even contribute and understand her lessons.

She told me she had advised the principal not to suspend a 8 year old but to no avail. There was just so much she could do.

I then called up the MOE and asked if they would help my son. He showed signs of giftedness and was always quick with his work, which was part of his behavioral problems.

At P2, he could work with fractions, negative numbers and algebra, forces and momentum, all self-taught. The MOE gave suggestions to the school to give him more advanced work. The school did NOTHING. They believed he is not gifted.

At the end of P2, despite all these problems and numerous suspensions and this teacher deliberately getting his project grades down (60% versus his average of 98%), he still managed to top the class and received academic honors.

I think this made the teacher really angry. She was getting personal.[/vc_column_text][/vc_column][/vc_row]